{"id":84,"date":"2020-06-14T11:59:00","date_gmt":"2020-06-14T11:59:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/141.148.246.190\/index.php\/single-post\/sara\/"},"modified":"2022-04-20T11:08:40","modified_gmt":"2022-04-20T11:08:40","slug":"sara","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/blog.alexisveenendaal.com\/index.php\/2020\/06\/14\/sara\/","title":{"rendered":"Sara"},"content":{"rendered":"
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<\/p>\n
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The following poem is a (somewhat belated) birthday dedication to my eldest sister.<\/em><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
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\u00a0<\/span><\/div>\n
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There once was a woman,<\/span><\/p>\n

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Named Sara Harding. <\/span><\/p>\n

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In the year 20-something<\/span><\/p>\n

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her midlife was starting.<\/span><\/p>\n

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Her hair nearly gray <\/span><\/p>\n

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And her mind turned a haze, <\/span><\/p>\n

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She could barely remember<\/span><\/p>\n

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Her tequila-filled days. <\/span><\/p>\n

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But after her birthday<\/span><\/p>\n

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had passed nearly by, <\/span><\/p>\n

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dear Sara realized <\/span><\/p>\n

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new things in the sky!<\/span><\/p>\n

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\u00a0<\/span><\/div>\n
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She had much better things now<\/span><\/p>\n

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than beer pong or beersbee, <\/span><\/p>\n

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she had a super computer <\/span><\/p>\n

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in her cyborg brain.<\/span><\/p>\n

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\u00a0<\/span><\/div>\n
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See, on the eve of her birthday<\/span><\/p>\n

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the aliens came.<\/span><\/p>\n

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They implanted some tech <\/span><\/p>\n

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inside her brain, <\/span><\/p>\n

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then they dropped her on earth <\/span><\/p>\n

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with a smile of glee <\/span><\/p>\n

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to see the destruction <\/span><\/p>\n

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she’d wreak sea to sea. <\/span><\/p>\n

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But Sara was clever <\/span><\/p>\n

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(since she was rather old) <\/span><\/p>\n

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and in all age’s wisdom, <\/span><\/p>\n

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She was equally bold. <\/span><\/p>\n

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She looked up to the sky, <\/span><\/p>\n

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where she did see a shape:<\/span><\/p>\n

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the dumb aliens there <\/span><\/p>\n

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had forgot to escape! <\/span><\/p>\n

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She looked up above <\/span><\/p>\n

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and stared at the sky.<\/span><\/p>\n

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Her eyes shot death lasers <\/span><\/p>\n

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as she waved them goodbye. <\/span><\/p>\n

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Her powers were super <\/span><\/p>\n

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and rather divine, <\/span><\/p>\n

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and the mere human mortals <\/span><\/p>\n

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Built her a shrine. <\/span><\/p>\n

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But it wasn’t enough<\/span><\/p>\n

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and she went seeking love, <\/span><\/p>\n

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and by her next birthday <\/span><\/p>\n

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she met John (good enough). <\/span><\/p>\n

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A few more birthdays<\/span><\/p>\n

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and then she had twins <\/span><\/p>\n

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(they might also be cyborgs – <\/span><\/p>\n

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just look at their grins) <\/span><\/p>\n

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\u00a0<\/span><\/div>\n
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And now Sara roams<\/span><\/p>\n

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a century later, <\/span><\/p>\n

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the world’s only cyborg <\/span><\/p>\n

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and alien hater.<\/span><\/p>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/article>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/article>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n

<\/main><\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

There once was a woman,
\nNamed Sara Harding.
\nIn the year 20-something
\nher midlife was starting.
\nHer hair nearly gray
\nAnd her mind turned a <\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":934,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"episode_type":"","audio_file":"","cover_image":"","cover_image_id":"","duration":"","filesize":"","date_recorded":"","explicit":"","block":"","filesize_raw":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[8,1],"tags":[129,128,73,76,71,127],"series":[],"class_list":["post-84","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-humour","category-poetry","tag-birthday","tag-cyborg","tag-humour","tag-joke","tag-poetry","tag-sara"],"episode_featured_image":"https:\/\/blog.alexisveenendaal.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/04\/pexels-miguel-a-padrinan-3520692.jpg","episode_player_image":"https:\/\/blog.alexisveenendaal.com\/wp-content\/plugins\/seriously-simple-podcasting\/assets\/images\/no-album-art.png","download_link":"","player_link":"","audio_player":false,"episode_data":{"playerMode":"dark","subscribeUrls":{"amazon":{"key":"amazon","url":"https:\/\/music.amazon.ca\/podcasts\/09c34bbc-b359-49af-a286-31830ed5634c\/short-stories","label":"Amazon","class":"amazon","icon":"amazon.png"},"apple_podcasts":{"key":"apple_podcasts","url":"https:\/\/podcasts.apple.com\/us\/podcast\/short-stories\/id1621456328","label":"Apple Podcasts","class":"apple_podcasts","icon":"apple-podcasts.png"},"google_play":{"key":"google_play","url":"https:\/\/podcasts.google.com\/feed\/aHR0cHM6Ly9hbGV4aXN2ZWVuZW5kYWFsLmNvbS9mZWVkL3BvZGNhc3Qvc2hvcnQtc3Rvcmllcw","label":"Google Play","class":"google_play","icon":"google-play.png"},"google_podcasts":{"key":"google_podcasts","url":"https:\/\/podcasts.google.com\/feed\/aHR0cHM6Ly9hbGV4aXN2ZWVuZW5kYWFsLmNvbS9mZWVkL3BvZGNhc3Qvc2hvcnQtc3Rvcmllcw","label":"Google Podcasts","class":"google_podcasts","icon":"google-podcasts.png"},"spotify":{"key":"spotify","url":"https:\/\/open.spotify.com\/show\/0lcQCRs52MfYlKs35lVX4K","label":"Spotify","class":"spotify","icon":"spotify.png"},"itunes":{"key":"itunes","url":"https:\/\/podcasts.apple.com\/us\/podcast\/short-stories\/id1621456328","label":"iTunes","class":"itunes","icon":"itunes.png"}},"rssFeedUrl":"https:\/\/blog.alexisveenendaal.com\/feed\/podcast\/default-podcast","embedCode":"

Sara<\/a><\/blockquote>